Fun Times With The Beckers

All the fun, even if it's not always blogged…

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #11 — June 6, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #11

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 11:
File this under something I actually said.

I previously mentioned here that i broke the news to the co-workers during our Thanksgiving pot-luck way back in November.

i may have mentioned that i work with a bunch of IT dudes and a few ladies… but mostly dudes. I joke that i am the first salaried chick to be pregnant here… and honestly, i don’t think that’s much of a stretch. before the big announcement, i was worried how it would be taken, but was pleasantly surprised at the outpouring of excitement and general wonder that has ensued over the past few months.

before i told the whole gang, i knew i should find a way to break the news to my boss… luckily, he gave me the opportunity.

Before the the pot-luck, we were discussing the virtues of bacon, and how he had cooked up three different kinds of bacon for this event.

he said, “I brought hickory smoked bacon, turkey bacon and bacon impregnated with maple syrup.”

from there, i found my opening, and said, “Funny you should say impregnated, because i am.”

and, i appreciate his candor and sense of humor. he took my comment perfectly and offered extreme congratulations. and then, he further assisted by helping me tell the rest of the office by watching me load up my plate at the pot-luck and saying, “go, girl, you’re eating for two now.”

i love my job.

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #10 — June 4, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #10

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 10:
a few weeks ago i had lunch with a very dear friend. i love her because we spend most of our time laughing, and have created our own language of jokes… it’s always great to see her.

she was telling me about her “Pickles” routine… i thought this had something to do with the legend (or FACT!) that pregnant women love/crave pickles… but she informed me differently.

she said that as she inched closer to each of the three due dates in her subsequent pregnancies, she always worried about her water breaking while shopping at the grocery store. so, first stop was to pick up a jar of pickles and carry them around with her. in the event that her water should break while browsing, she planned to simply drop the jar of pickles, feign an apologetic look toward the stock-boy and rush out of there– blaming the leak on the pickles and not the start of labor.

this cracks me up! not sure if i’ll try it…. but hilarious all the same!

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #8 — May 17, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #8

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 8:
My Sweet Niece just turned 4. she is trying to understand why all the grown-ups keep talking about this baby that she has still seen no proof of arrival. The concept of time is a touchy thing for kids, and Sweet Niece is quite bright – so i am sure she “Gets” it… just doesn’t understand all the waiting….

Her mom, however, my FAB Sister-In-Law, has been jumping for joy since the moment of our announcement back in October. She keeps exclaiming how excited she is to be an Aunt. Finally, an Aunt! I am pumped for her- she’s the best!!!

Apparently though, Sweet Niece decided it was all too much, one day, and asked her mom to sit down for a chat.

She said, “Mom, I’m not so sure I want KT to have a baby.”

SIL said, “Well, why not? it’s going to be pretty fun, and you will have a cousin!”

Sweet Niece then said, “Yeah, but when she has the baby, and you become an Aunt, you won’t by my Mommy anymore, and I don’t want you to stop being my Mommy!”

SIL then calmly informed her that would never happen, and being an Aunt is an added bonus…

how sweet is that?

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #7 — May 12, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #7

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 7:
This post goes back about 26 weeks… at our very first appointment, AJ was kind enough to come with me (as he has, graciously, for all following appointments!)… and, having never been inside of a Gynecologists office, the look of wonder on his face was palpable.

This visit also happened to coincide with my annual appointment (i am so organized that way!) so i had to dress down to the lovely provided gown.

a few moments of awkward silence and casual jokes and conversation while we waited for the Doc to come in… and then, *knock*knock*

Said Doctor walks in and says, “How are We doing today?”

before i had a chance to respond, a nervous AJ says, “Oh, I’m okay, I guess.”

I looked at him and said, “Honey, she’s not asking about YOU!”

i love that boy!

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #6 — April 30, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #6

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 6:
yesterday, had lunch with my dear Mom. it had been about one full week since i had seen her last. as i walked into our favorite lunch place , she looked right at me and exclaimed,

“Oh! You’re getting so big!”

thanks, Mom!

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #5 — April 27, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant #5

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 5:
My Mother-In-Law was staying over a few weekends ago, and she and i were chatting in the kitchen while i ate my requisite breakfast of honey nut cheerios – standing up – when she asked me, “When do you think you will start to show?”

um, hello! i am 30 weeks (at the time) pregnant… do you think i still just look chubby?

i fully understand that i still have a few weeks and the most “growth” comes at this time… but will honestly say, i still am caught off guard when i catch a glimpes of my reflection from the side!

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #4 — February 24, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #4

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 4:
recently, i attended my regularly-scheduled haircut appointment with the sweetest beautician in the world. as timing would have it, she too is expecting a little one- in March. They know it is going to be a girl, and have gone all out with pink things! it’s fun to chat about baby stuff as she gives the locks a wee trim.

she, too, seemed concerned that we were not going to find out the sex of The Bean until the birth. apparently, some people just can’t seem to handle this anomaly. so, she proceeded to do the “ring test” on me, which she swears will predict the sex of the baby. again, the fact that i don’t want to know didn’t seem to enter into this activity.

either way- she yanks a hair out of my head– i was hoping she would pick one of the gray ones, but nope. and then slipped it through my wedding ring and held it over my right wrist.

then she says, “see, i knew it – it’s going in circles – it’s a girl!”…

honestly? i can see her swinging her hand in a circular motion.

then she says, “see, i’ll show you, it works on me too.” so she holds up her wrist and believe it or not (i say, not) here it swings in a circle again– again, i notice her hand moving in a circle as well.

this just cracked me up.

though i did find this on YouTube.

at this rate, i might as well name the child Ouija!

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #3 — February 8, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #3

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 3:
after we heard the heartbeat, and knew that The Bean was actually in there (i am slightly superstitious, what can i say?), it was time to spread the word. I took the opportunity to tell the majority of my co-workers as we enjoyed a Thanksgiving pot-luck at the office the day before the holiday break. The response was great – everyone is so nice and sweet.

Later that day, a certain co-worker, that has made it clear that she prefers pets to children stopped by my office to offer another round of congrats… which was very nice… though, in her way, it could be taken differently, for sure. Instead of a typical salute, i hear, “Good Luck With That.”

Classic, if you ask me.

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #2 — January 27, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #2

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus continues a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 2:
when we broke the news to a certain family member (to remain nameless), the response was strikingly underwhelming. if i remember correctly, (and i was listening through the outside of the cell phone that was at AJ’s ear) the response was,
“oh…. well… congratulations?”

honestly.

a few moments later another question: “well, this was a surprise, right?” to which AJ responded, no, we planned it, and we are very excited.

i know i shouldn’t laugh, but this entire exchange just makes me giggle. i mean, really? Really!

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #1 — January 11, 2010

Funny Things Heard While Pregnant – #1

I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus begins a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 1:
as i try to discretely buy the home pregnancy test, i choose to go to the photo counter at Walgreen’s – that is currently staffed by a nice woman, and i won’t have to wait – where as, if i stood in the usual check out line, i would be waiting behind four people of varying odoriferous natures and then ultimately meeting up with the 17-year-old, pimply faced checkout boy who probably wouldn’t know what to do with the test, and have to call over the loud speaker for a Price Check. (okay, i understand, worst case scenario considered here, but honestly – if you were in my shoes, which line would you choose?)

i walk up to the counter and confirm that, yes, i can make a non-photo related purchase at the photo counter.

i give here a “woman to woman” type look as i discretely slide the test across the counter… and then she dives into her own memory bank and decides to share:
“oh, i took one of those tests 18 years ago, and boy, did it turn blue! i was scared out of my mind, and then i left it on the kitchen table and didn’t realize all my roommates would see it – but they surely did, and they were all like, ‘Oh, S*!+! what are you going to do now?’ i mean, i was putting myself through school and it was crazy… but i am telling you, that was the best accident of my life!”

TMI lady, but thanks.