I am learning that sometimes people just don’t know what to say, or can’t help themselves from saying what they want to say… Thus begins a compendium of the funny/odd/weird/tasteless/forthright things people have said to me whilst in “the family way”.

Number 1:
as i try to discretely buy the home pregnancy test, i choose to go to the photo counter at Walgreen’s – that is currently staffed by a nice woman, and i won’t have to wait – where as, if i stood in the usual check out line, i would be waiting behind four people of varying odoriferous natures and then ultimately meeting up with the 17-year-old, pimply faced checkout boy who probably wouldn’t know what to do with the test, and have to call over the loud speaker for a Price Check. (okay, i understand, worst case scenario considered here, but honestly – if you were in my shoes, which line would you choose?)

i walk up to the counter and confirm that, yes, i can make a non-photo related purchase at the photo counter.

i give here a “woman to woman” type look as i discretely slide the test across the counter… and then she dives into her own memory bank and decides to share:
“oh, i took one of those tests 18 years ago, and boy, did it turn blue! i was scared out of my mind, and then i left it on the kitchen table and didn’t realize all my roommates would see it – but they surely did, and they were all like, ‘Oh, S*!+! what are you going to do now?’ i mean, i was putting myself through school and it was crazy… but i am telling you, that was the best accident of my life!”

TMI lady, but thanks.

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